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Sunday, February 14, 2010

Take a Flying Leap, Hallmark

Right, so all of this talk about the dreaded VD had me thinking about the best gifts I have ever received. I have gotten great ones. Tiffany jewelry, more Tiffany jewelry, a special made cake that looked exactly like a Tiffany box.......

diamond rings, designer purses, vacations, the list goes on........but this is the one that always sticks out in my head far above all the rest. It is the one that I know no one else has ever gotten. Of course, now that I am putting it out here, someone else may someday get it, but hey, whatevs, I got it first.

The thing is, you don't find actual feelings like this in a card. I used to read Dr. Seuss to my kids not just because they liked them but because I liked the sing song rhymes myself. It was comforting and reviving and made me smile. Thing 1 and Thing 2 with their crazy blue hair and their red pajama outfits reminded me of my two little brothers (well, not the blue hair, but, everything else about them).

In the middle of a horrible day I placed a call, just seeking a minute of peace and reassurance, if memory serves, I was about to fire an employee, one who I was friends with outside of work. When I came home, this is what I found......

The framed poem, in very Seuss-like prose, reads as follows:

Just Look What He's Done

Yes Your Husband Did That

He Brought Home Those Things From The Cat In The Hat

He Brought Home Those Things

Thing One And Thing Two

Because Of Your Call

Because You Were Blue

So Now They Are Here And He Just Wants To Say

Know That I Love You

And Have A Great Day!

Somehow I just don't think that can ever be mass produced. It is unique, special. I will always treasure it. Will probably give it to my daughter when she gets older so she will have it as a keepsake of my relationship with her father. Something tells me she will treasure it, as do I.

So, VD can suck it, but true sentiment, I am all for that. Now, go forth and fornicate people. It's VD after all, spread stuff! ;)


Phoenixism said...

That's great.
Explains why you

1) Are still married
2) Will not reveal the tattoo

Happy V-Day!

(Oh, P.S....I don't need reasons to fornicate....)

secret agent woman said...

I love that. One of my best gifts was a card with a funny poem my then-husband wrote making fun of a pompous supervisor of mine that I'd been fretting about.

Miss Spoken said...


Dammit, I love that .....

Miss Spoken said...

Valentines Day /// in a word: cunilingus

Wicked Shawn said...

Cold Shower- So quick to jump to conclusions.
My tattoos(plural) are in rather obvious places, but I guess I could get really spec-fucking-tacular, pull out some yoga moves and try to get all 3 in one nice, tight shot at once...that would make it interesting....

SA- It's little things like those that stay with you the longest

Spoken-Fuck. Me. Too. I will have one of what you're having, doll. Fellatio as well.