I Hit My Head.........

No, seriously, I fell and hit my fucking head. So, to set the scene, joining friends and family for dinner at a nice restaurant last night. Gathered for a few pre-dinner drinks. I behaved myself and stuck to 2 very small, very slow paced glasses of wine.

Arrived for dinner, I stuck with wine, (a super delicious Riesling, by the way, yuummmmyyy) had some bread, sipped slowly, enjoyed the company, had a delicious meal, then decided to step out on the patio for fresh air and to pollute my lungs with a Wicked bit of nicotine (the horror).

I was joined outside by a couple who walked over and positioned themselves directly in front of me in such a way that it was impossible not to either speak or split them like a linebacker and make a run for it. My mind is still a tiny fuzzy but here is a go at it:

Me: Hi
She: Hi there, you from here?
Me: Yes, this general area. You guys?
He: No, we're just down for the day from Indy, going home tomorrow.
Me: Nice, business?
He: No, just came down for dinner and stuff. (at this point She looks at He as if to call Bullshit, then turns her gaze back to me, serious tension and She is seriously d-r-u-n-k)
She: Actually, we came down here to make twins. (now He is looking at She like he wants to slap a bitch)
Me: Yeah, I never could conceive in Indy either (ok, not my best, but these are total fucking strangers playing out their fucking drama after cornering me WTF!! I'm just trying to lighten the tone a little)
She: Oh, it's not that, he just needs a little help.
Me: (wince) Well, good luck with all that, I'm going to get in out of this cold, ya'll enjoy the rest of your trip. (forced smile)
He: Thanks, sorry.

Now is where it gets just super fucking fabulous, as he moves so I can step over to the ashtray, I have to take an awkward step to maneuver between him and a concrete pillar. In doing so, the heel of my shoe got caught in a crack and, yep, you guessed it..........I fucking went down. Only I didn't just fall a little, I hit my head so hard on the fucking concrete that I was disoriented. Call me Brett Favre, we can relate now, talk football and concussions. Holy hell.


At first I was just concerned about my shoe. Duh! Were you expecting something else? But, it was fine. Then I realized my knee really hurt. Which made sense, because it looks worse than my head. But, I really don't think it can be blamed for the sudden overwhelming need to sleep, or the waves of nausea that followed. The inability to remember or explain what had happened. The whole thing was made worse by the fact that everyone with me was intoxicated and thought I was just drunk. Ummm, hello, I can't drink that much anymore because of my meds!!!

So, yeah, I spent the night hoping that I wasn't going to die because I wasn't really sure if you can die from a concussion but I couldn't remember what my neurologist's name was or find my phone so I figured it was just a matter of hope and luck. It also occurred to me at one point in the wee hours of the morning during a round of nausea that severe blows to the head are of more significance to epileptics, I am almost certain I saw that on his office walls one time, when I was really bored and reading those posters. Fucking posters.

The good news is, I can now feel the pain of the lovely lump on my forehead, can almost walk a straight line, and I remember most of the small details and all of the major details of last night. Survival baby!! Wicked rough night. Also, the woman on the patio at the restaurant, can you say, COUNSELING???!!!! Hope your weekend is going a hellluva lot better than mine!!!