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Thursday, February 18, 2010

So You Have a Harem, I Am a Whore??

What's the most expedient way to cause my normally low blood pressure to reach what would be an average reading for most people, but is in fact high for me? State as fact a ridiculous double standard and then preach that double standard to a large number of brainless, sheeplike individuals who for no apparent reason other than your unproven, yet self proclaimed success hang on your every fucking word.

Enter the phenomenon that is Roissy in DC. It is a blog. One that I am not posting a link to here. Yes, I know that is poor form. If that gets back to the creator of that blog and he/she/it has a problem with that, he/she/it is more than welcome to come here and we will discuss it like one name calling adult and one fucking moronic, infantile, cocksure, self important, womanizing prick. (I will let you guess which one of those will be me)

I read through a lot of crap, things that really don't interest me in any way other than learning more about other people's views on life. Expanding my knowledge of the human race and how other people think. But sometimes it just pisses me off, because I am often reminded that many of them really spend so much time thinking "How can I spend more time accommodating my dick?" Not the Dick we all know and love, but the male genitalia form of dick, known as lower case d, from here on.

Of course, I wasn't the least surprised to see the valentine's post over there proclaiming "Harem Management" (no, I am not fucking kidding you, close your mouth and wipe your chin off) is simple, you call your girl who has a sex rank of 7or lower, you push her furthest away from the holiday because she is the least important, then you call your next highest, (oh, for those of you who didn't realize, we all have a rank, based on our age, our BMI and our sexual performance, best I can tell, I am a mere 7, my age pulls me down, anything over 23 pretty much fucks you out of being a 9 or 10, sorry ladies) and so on. Anyway, the point of this was, you plan ahead and you avoid lying to them if at all possible. Only avoid lying so you don't have a bunch of lies floating around to keep straight.

Also, notably sound advice, (also hilarious to me because these guys actually plan their lives around servicing their lower case d) make sure you enter a career that requires regular travel to various cities, this way your harem consists of women in different cities and you don't have to worry about uncomfortable situations. Genius.

So, I am reading the comments, guys idolizing this asshat for his brilliance. Can't wait to implement his plan. Recounting their past failures and now they see the light and will follow his path, blah blah blah.

It's a bunch of crap, but much of what you would expect from college and other 20 something single guys, then I see the one.........."I am married and have two women in separate cities, I have been working this system effectively now for over 4 years. As long as you keep a cool head, separate bank accounts and remember your stories you can never go wrong. Your marriage will remain solid, your girls will be happy and you will lead a full life"...... that is not verbatim, because honestly, something about that post made me so sick to my stomach, I just couldn't make myself go back and read it again, plus, I figure I shouldn't copy from the site since I refuse to post the web addy.

I know married guys cheat, believe me, I definitely know it. But something about that comment, his cavalier attitude, his use of the phrase "your marriage will remain solid" Does his wife sit at home caring for kids thinking she has a solid marriage? OMG.....I am not an overly sensitive type, but this just infuriated me, then I read the following few comments, one was lauding him for his abilities and praising him as a role model. Time for me to move on.

I switched to a different post. One where they were picking apart a Washington Post letter from a man who suspected the child his wife had given birth to was night his. Was it possible she had an affair and he wasn't aware? The word whore was tossed around more than paternity test. I couldn't help but start laughing, because, well, I don't want to replace my laptop and frankly, it just wouldn't have survived me throwing it across the room. So, a man with multiple partners in other cities is to be praised, but a woman who may be repeating this behavior is a whore? Now boys.....

Let me be clear. It goes a little like this. You want to talk about Alpha and Beta. Alpha males come in, they grab their woman, they tell her they are going to fuck her, then fuck her right and proper they do. Betas come in, they wash the dishes, run her some bath water, massage her back, ask her if they can make love to her and hope she says yes. I get that. A combination of the two is what every woman wants and guys find it virtually impossible to find that balance because depending on the day we have had, that balance we are looking for is different. What is so different for us, one minute you want us to call your mother and make nice and then you want us to hang up the phone and instantly have an overwhelming desire to place your lower case d in our mouth. Yeah, how do you think that is going to work out? Know why a mistress sucks your lower case d on command? She hasn't met your fucking mother. She never washes your fucking underwear. She has probably never, ever had to take care of you while you were sick. You know, which means she has never had to BE your mother. Yes, I fucking went there. So, you can Alpha Beta it up all you want, boys, but in the end, it's not so different, Madonna/Whore, anyone?

Now back to you PUA/game obsessed mother fuckers, it's time for you to sit up and take notice. You want us to feel so damn sorry for you balancing this delicate Alpha Beta game. Step into our stilettos for a moment, if you would be so bold. First we get to figure out, okay, is he gaming or is he serious. One nighters are fine with some of us, but some of you assheads like to spit game assuming that you can only get laid if you pretend there is long term shit dangling. Don't be a douchenozzle, state your fucking intentions, if your not worthy of a one nighter, buff it up, loserboy! Then we get to figure out, okay, is he talking to me because he wants to talk to me or is this one of the new gamers "talk to the friend of the one you actually want" yes asshats, we are aware of these dumbass tactics, we aren't the emptyheaded bimbos you are hoping to land, and as much as you like to tell yourself your game works on girls who know about game, your wrong. The minute you slip and any one of us spot it...you are fucking blacklisted like you just don't know, which is why you go home with a 4 that night and there are 5 groups of 7-10's waving and laughing as you go, that is us making you our bitch for the night, I believe, in terms you could understand, it's the equivalent to a cumshot in your face bitch! Stop reading so many fucking game blogs and watching game shows and talk to real people who actually date. Like in normal relationships that you can see. Have you ever SEEN these people who say they have a "Harem" of 20 women? Has it not yet occurred to you that it could be the man beast in the clown house across the street from me? Cause I have to tell you, you want no part of that, ever heard the old adage, "One man's trash is another man's treasure"? Just sayin.

So, you strive for your harem if that's what you really want. But, be careful what you wish for, my boy. Hell hath no fury like a crazy ass, stupid bimbo who fell for some lame ass game and then realized she got punked, my boy. As for being a whore, I will pass on it, but if you are dipping your lower case d in numerous lower case p's, only to find that one or two of them was feeling a bit neglected and strayed, that doesn't make them any more of a whore than you. You get as good as you give, my dears.

14 comments:

secret agent woman said...

I checked that blog briefly - it isn't poor form not to post a link - I never link to idiots. The whole alpha/beta male crap is just that - crap. I want a partner - someone who values me as much as I value him. A strong lover and a decent guy. I think that goober is just using "alpha male" as a cover term for "narcissistic prick."

O.G. said...

I have to tell you that I fucking love this post.

I went over to check out this chick's blog and it seems like a bunch of stuff that the makers of Axe might write. But at least she has the formula correct - talk about sex and even a guy who would previously considered smart will follow you around with drool coming out of the side of his mouth.

Wicked Pen said...

and..... I CONCUR

-Pen

Phoenixism said...

Beauty, Shawn.
I'm a "headline reader" of Roissy's site. If the headline just hints a subject that will probably involve a bunch of guys in a mutual strokefest, I pass. But there are occasional nuggets of wisdom there that do deserve to be discussed. I come from the attitude of a "disinterested participant."

I might write more later, but I have to hit the weights now. You know, cause I'm such an alpha, roarrrr!!

Wicked Shawn said...

SA- Alpha=Strong Beta=Decent from what I have been reading, that is pretty much the dead on balance they can' quite reach

OG- I fucking love that you fucking love this post! ;)

Pen- I knew you would girl

Cold Shower- Righhht, and you buy Playboy for the articles. Gotcha! *giggle* Enjoy that workout, you Alpha maniac you, by the way, 8 years your junior, if I remember yours correctly, tyvm. ;)

Phoenixism said...

Roarrrr.
Shitty work out, these old bones need a break. And I mean old.

You've given me an idea for a post tonight.

One thing I see happening in the case of Roissy and similar sites is that you see a lot of like-minded people clustering together and the outside "real" world is dismissed.

It's easy to speak in grand generalities about the nature of man and woman but in the every day world of face to face interactions, how do you practice your marginal views. Would you tell your mom all the shit you say about women? Maybe some of these guys would. Maybe one problem is bad mother-son relationships. They would say women nowadays can't raise sons right. Maybe they are right...but I've always insisted men are not blameless. Fatherhood needs some tweaking.

And there are quite a few guys who may agree with some of his opinions in principle but don't care for the messenger. Roissy can be difficult to swallow for the average bear...his commenters fall into quite a different world. They work themselves up into some weird state of hyper victimization. That turns me off. If you suck with women, maybe you should look inwards first.

A Vapid Blonde said...

He's probably the kind of guy that got caught whacking it to a picture of his hot cousin...who may or may not be female. And is now trying to smash that memory down the throat of some dopey chick with his dick that actually believes him when he tells her she has beautiful eyes...what ever color they may be.

bonanza jellybean said...

Pure Awesomeness Shawn - Didn't bother going over to site.

Recently, my babysitter found a note in her husbands pocket. Said note read, "I cannot wait to see you I miss you". He has a job that requires travel, she has raised his 4 kids as well as wipe other kids asses for a better part of her life, he also has a skeezy smile. When she found it and went off, he claimed he found it on the ground. You see it wasn't his. Most married men pick up notes from the ground that are not intended for them and save them. She believed him.

Do big tits factor in the fuckability rating?

Steph said...

You got my blood boiling with the cheating asshole double standard! I'm in an industry where I travel a lot and there are MANY cheaters - men and women.

One night I TALKED to a man in a restaurant about work for an hour or so. By the next day, apparently I was a cheating whore and he was a stud. Never mind that nothing happened - what the fuck? Why couldn't I be the stud and he be the cheating asshole?

Love your blog by the way!

Aunt Juicebox said...

Why is all that melodrama even needed? Stay single. If you can afford a wife, you can afford a maid instead. Hire a maid, and date as many women as you want. And there are plenty of women out there who are looking for the same thing men are looking for - someone to date/sleep with and NO strings attached.

These kind of guys are the reason the divorce rate is so high. I mean, the wife is going to eventually find out, either through suspicious activity you thought you had covered, or one of your side dishes finding out you're married and ratting you out in anger. They are playing the game now, but when they are paying child support and alimony in a few years, they'll have to wonder if it was worth it.

txtingmrdarcy said...

Great post, Shawn! I didn't even want to click over because lately, the mood I'm in, I would have ripped this person a new asshole.

That's absolutely disgusting. I'm with Aunt Juicebox. Why the hell get married if you're not tired of fucking everything that moves? There are plenty of other people who deserve your spouse more than you do.

Wicked Shawn said...

Cold Shower- Rest is bad, keep working.....:) Look forward to reading the post, does that make me your long distance muse?

Blonde- That is my vision of this guy, I swear, I just see some guy who couldn't keep the attention of an intelligent woman for more than 3 minutes, so he rolls through bimbos, I think his idea of a 10 is probably a real man's 5.


Jellybean- I hate to hear that about your friend, sometimes when faced with such a harsh reality, to use the ostrich method is much easier. Besides, all the men I know pick up random notes like that and keep them, especially married ones who travel. Ugh. Epic fail!!

Steph- Welcome to the party! Thanks for the comment, I love participation. Yes, always nice to be made part of the "man gets praised and high fives, woman loses credibility and looked at with reproach" over something that didn't even happen. That's when a little dipset is nice. The pointedly public drop by "Too bad you couldn't work up the nerve to come to my room last night _____, we really could have gotten a lot of work done." with a Wicked grin as you walk away. Problem solved!

Aunt J- that would require honesty and honor, something none of that crowd grasps.

txting- Hmmm, give it a bit, I have confidence someone else will end up with their spouses. ;)

Anonymous said...

The people I've met who follow 'The Game' are all tragic.

How bad do you have to be to have to reduce talking to people into some sort of sub-Dungeons and Dragons experience?

Toast (The one off the wedding wager blog thing)

P.S. Asshat is a great insult.

Biscuit said...

GAH! I HATE the whole cheating thing. I am a grown-up and if you have done something naughty, silly, wrong the TALK to me and we'll see if we can sort it out.

As men go, I have always been pretty laid back and open minded and I understand that people fuck up sometimes.

The thing that destroys relationships for me is the LIES. I had an ex who I KNEW had been up to no good (nothing major, but this was on the back of a string of BS). When I asked her, she not only flatly denied it she tried to make me feel bad for suggesting that she might have done anything.

Had she come to me and talked about it then we could have been fine.

I'm astounded at the justification and smokescreens that some people will employ for quite unacceptable behaviour.

On the plus side if I ever saw any ofthis again I would bedropping the girl like a... well... like a burning pointy thing with poison on?

Also I TOTALLY agree with the rant against double standards. The stud/whore labels should be applied equally across the sexes.