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Tuesday, February 23, 2010

I Would Do Them, Under Different Circumstances........

It's one of those night's where I just feel like looking at beautiful people. Ever have one of those. So, let me show you some of the people I find appealing. Not those stupid Maxim I Would Rape Her girls, or the People's Top 10 Sexiest Men Alive types. I don't think. No George Clooney or Brad Pitt on my list. I like my guys flawed, a little more real. I think Jennifer what's her name is pretty, but she's about as bright as the lamp by my bed that I keep forgetting to change the bulb in, which totally distracts me. I can't help it. I would buy one of those dolls if a brain was not required for me. Also, not to ruin the fantasy, but one of the different circumstances for the girls below would be if I were bi, which, I'm not, but hey, fantasize away. It's not for me to judge. ;)

Ever watch the show Bones? I really love David Boreanaz.

Gerard Butler, not Gerard Butler from 300 all oiled up and shouting indecipherable shit at the cameras. Nah, not feeling that. I'm more the Gerard Butler of Law Abiding Citizen, evil plotting genius kind of girl. Oh hell to the yeah.

David Duchovny, simply put: Californication. Sexual proclivities.

Jason Statham....and oh hot damn, the accent. Bonus points!!

Jimmy Fallon, shut your mouth. There is so much to be said for a guy who can make you laugh, plus he's a doll. So damn cute in that disheveled way. So, fuck off if you don't like it.

Okay, now for the ladies...........

Smoking hot and getting hotter by the day, Jennifer Aniston

Zooey Deschannel is super innocent looking, but something tells me those big eyes have some big secrets. I think she is really beautiful.

Pink is just plain fucking hot. She rocks a serious set of pipes and she is majorly acrobatic. Uhh, hello??!!

Now you have a little taste of the quirky people who I think are hotter than the average hot. Not really a post of boredom so much as a little insight into who I am without me giving you any actual information about me, which is what I almost posted about tonight. Some generic 10 Things You Don't Know About Me sort of thing. But as I started to type it, I realized how truly disinterested I was with sharing the minutia of my life with people who probably weren't interested in hearing it. So, instead, you got the hotness. You're welcome. Now, off to work or play or whatever it is you do after reading this lovely little cluttered page of mine.

I am off to crawl in bed next to someone who looks suspiciously similar to Jason Statham, and no, I promise I didn't do that on purpose. ;)


A Vapid Blonde said...

I do agree with them all except Jimmy Fallon.

Pink is hot!

Also not bi...no matter what anyone tells you!

Miss Spoken said...

1) Mike Rowe from Dirty Jobs - as previously stated, he's dirty and has a job. A Dirty Job. And his voice makes my panties fall off.

2) Doctor Drew - not only is he hot but he can write prescriptions. 'nough said.

3) Henry Rollins - Black Flag era. That's the kind of guy who would totally have my back in a bar fight. Because clearly I talk a lot of shit and need 40 inch biceps and a stomach I can wash my filthy mouth on.

4) Sherilyn Fenn - She's like a young Liz Taylor but I'd still do her.

So there's my Christmas List for next year, Wicked. Just box 'em up and ship them on over. I'll have Fallon lined up for you, duct tape and all.

Anonymous said...

Heyyyyyy, P!nk is all mineeeeee - see my post today!! Maybe she is sending out lots of 'lust me' vibes today or something ;0)

I am going to have to start remembering that I am British and stop trying to write in American!! I forget you guys love the accent... see I said 'guys'... I meant folks!

Wicked Shawn said...

Blonde- Damn, so one less reason for me to try it. *sigh*

Spoken- How can you like Dr. Drew and not Jimmy? They look almost identical only Dr Drew is older and not as funny....WTF?? BTW...OMG, Henry is HOTTTTT not just Black Flag days, although yeah, back then too, but he was still hot mid 2000's.

ED- How did we get our post's crossed so insanely?? Oooops! All good, as I said, you take Pink, I take Jen and Gerard and have HOTTEST 3some EVAH!! We swap details, all is right with the world.

Wicked Pen said...

i concur.


even JF looks hot!

and love of your life DOES look like JS. whoa. except i think love of your life is a little cuter ;-)

and miss spoken.. i'm on the dr. drew train with ya!


Wicked Shawn said...

I've been telling you Jimmy F is hot, about damn time somebody recognize.

And yesssss, Love of Life totally does look like Jason Statham, and yessssss, I do lovvvvve the hell out of that!!!!

Phoenixism said...

Zooey Deschannel.
Don't know who she is, never heard of her, but she's hot.
Tag team anybody?

Henry Rollins is great. He once wrote a short essay about weight-lifiting, captures the mental essence of it which many people don't realize. Sorry I had to kill that mood, ladies.

Anonymous said...

def down with david du-covet-me. but i have to add hugh laurie (love an arrogant opiate head), ryan gosling (lars i AM the real girl), woody harrelson (built like a mofo and charming as shit in zombieland), bill murray (i'm lost in his translation),and johnny depp(obvs).

my bi-curious brain loves jenn and pink is a total bad-ass! i also obsess over scarlett jo's curves and lips, cate blanchett's intelligence, and frances mcdormand's total coolness (laurel canyon).

Aunt Juicebox said...

I used to LOVE David Duchovny. Until he married what's her face, Tia Leoni. Can't stand that chick, and anybody who would marry her is just disgusting.

Mmmmm Jason Statham. Yummy.

Wicked Shawn said...

Cold Shower- No apologies, I actually remember reading a collection of Henry's short stories at some point in my life. Yeah, that would be the point when I was dating a skater and he forced me, but I did enjoy Henry.
As for Zooey, under different circumstances :)

Patty- Hugh just doesn't do it for me, love the show, he's cool, but not a turn on. (dodges the flying objects from the blogworld who I have observed showing this man mad love)

I laid off Scarlett Jo-Hotness out of respect for my son, who would never forgive me if I had her first. :)

AJ- Damnit Woman, Tea Leoni was my computer generated doppleganger! How dare you hate on my not-really-me self like that! *trying very hard to make indignant face right now* Okay, I'm past it, but still, Jason Statham is HHHOTTT.

Damn me and this post, all day today I have thought of people who should have been on this list!!!

Paul Wynn said...

Wicked Jimmy Fallon made the list??? You would wear him out real quick, throw someone worthy like Ryan Reynolds. I'm not gay but...

Elly Lou said...

I'm disturbingly obsessed with Jonathan Rhys Meyers. Holy God when he gets his Tudors on my lady bits get seventeen kinds of fired up.


Wicked Shawn said...

Paul- Where have you been doll? Jimmy is my One True Hollywood Love, I sent him chocolate vaginas for Valentines day and everything, had the Olympics not come along at such an inopporune time, I am certain he would have publicly prefessed his love for me on the national airwaves by now. Ryan Reynolds, eh, take him, then leave him. Scarlett can keep him.

Elly- Absolutely with you, The Ms from TxtingMrDarcy and I just talked about that the other day. Totally oozes sexyyyy!!

Yankee Girl said...

I love Jason Statham. I would lick him all over!

A Mother's Thoughts said...

Mmmm, Gerald Butler, I would take him in any circumstance!! lol Great list!! And if I were a lesbian (which I'm not), I would totolly do Pink too!

That Kind Of Girl said...

Love your list -- especially David Duchovny (omfg) and Jason Statham (who I can only admire on a purely aesthetic level, because he looks like my bff's boyfriend so any sort of celebrity crushing would be awk.)

Also on my list: Jason Segel (z0mg), Alec Baldwin, and Jason Schwartzman, in my mind, where he is taller.

secret agent woman said...

Ever see "Dear Frankie"? Gerard Butler in an understated sweet. sexy role. Rent it.

Anonymous said...

Jennifer Aniston must be a nut job because I can't think of any other reason why so many guys would dump her. She's so fucking hot.

Wicked Shawn said...

Yankee Girl- Welcome to my little den of Wickedness, thanks for taking a minute to comment. As Pen pointed out, Love of my Life is a ringer for JS, so I do get to lick him all over on the now and again. Tasty!! ;)

Mother's Thought's- Welcome to you, too!! Dropped by your place earlier, it's lovely. I suggest others do the same :) Can never really get enough of any of the good stuff, can one?

TKOG-Alec? This will be pondered while lying awake tonight.

SA- It's now on my list of things to see.

OG- I read in an interview once where she says that she is in real life what the character Monica was on Friends. So, yeah, a little crazy, but dayum, when you look like that, she must be crazy and frigid...something....I don't get it, Angelina has man arms, all veiny and stuff, remember the manhand episode of Seinfeld? Just sayin.

Anonymous said...

I'm with you on Zooey Deschanel... I don't know what it is, probably her voice (Her cd is really good, btw.). I also like Alexis Bledel. They have the same porcelain doll-face thing going.

Right now I am ALL ABOUT Ryan Reynolds. Too bad he is all about ScarJo. :-P

Anonymous said...

ps- Totally jealous that you got "that kind of girl" to comment! I've been reading her for MONTHS and she's fabulous. :)