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Monday, March 8, 2010

Wicked Girls.....Have Better Things To Talk About.....

We all know them. Wicked girls simply aren't one of them. Take stock of yourself. A really hard look. No, really. Do you glance through the tabloids in the checkout line at the grocery, or do you excitedly buy it as soon as you see a new one? Do you just think it's horrible that John left Kate and took off with that other woman? Do you feel compelled to call friends and talk about it with your friends? Have you, at any point in your life, tried to discuss this woman's haircut with ANYONE?

Do you find yourself talking to one friend about the faults of your other friends? All of them. Some of them even perhaps personal issues that the friends in question possibly expect to be confidences between only the two of you.

You, my dears, have a problem. Basically, you need to invest some time in yourself, in getting a life of your fucking own. You are self-destructing. You will eventually destroy all of your existing friendships, as this is a horrible way to treat friends and chances are, if your friends have a brain in their head, they will realize, "Hey, if this person talks to me about ALL of their other friends, then they probably say shitty things about me to all of their other friends". How long do you figure that friendship is going to survive?

Gossip is a low level form of boredom. Boredom with your own life, really. When lacking anything truly interesting going on with yourself, replace conversation with interesting things going on in others. Or, distraction. When you are unhappy with the things going on in your own life, distract from it by pointing out the flaws in others. Neither of these tactics are acceptable. Fix your own fucking life, boys and girls! Oh, yeah, guys, you are SO included in this. Don't even try to put it off on the ladies. Men are as bad, sometimes worse, so don't sit there tsk, tsking with some superior attitude. I'm not falling for it.

Go bungee jumping, pick up a new hobby, dance on a bar, table, lap, whatever. Liven your own life up a little. Make your own story more interesting. Stop the need to tell other people's story. I promise you, more people will be drawn to you when it is your own life you want to talk about during everyday conversation. No one wants to walk away from a day at the spa or a game night and wonder what the hell their so called friend is going to tell people, real or lies, about them for the next week. Not every one is like me. Some of you actually give a fuck what the story is, so choose your friends mindfully, gossipers will gossip about you just as quickly as they gossip to you. If you are a gossiper, stop it and find something more interesting to do with your time.

PS. Wednesday questions need to be submitted to formspring by Wednesday @ 5pm EST please. Ask anything, but I must warn you, I plan to drink a bottle of wine before I answer any questions. Might not be a good time to request information on how to fill out the FAFSA!!


Jana said...

It sure is a sorry way to lose all your friends; something which can be totally avoided;only if one kept a little control over one's tongue.

Some people seem to be almost addicted to it though and have proclaimed to suffer from terrible withdrawal symptoms without their daily dose of gossip!!!

Athol Kay: Married Man Sex Life said...

Kate's haircut is called a reverse mullet. Party up front, vicious pitbull at the back.

Phoenixism said...

Shawn, you are a cut above the average bear, that's for sure.

But women usually love the gossip, we know that, don't we :) I'm glad you pointed out the male factor. I've seen men who delight in gossip and they aren't even gay...but it sure comes across as womanly when they do it.

Moooooog35 said...

Fix my own life instead of making fun of others?

You're funny.

Pennypenpen said...

damn it. i forgot to fill out my FAFSA.

i knew this blog was going to make a difference. LOLOLOL

and gossiping friends are a pain in the ass. sometimes friends vent to each other, it happens, friends piss each other off sometimes. but to make it a habit... naw. gossip/drama is exhausting. i just don't have the time or the energy anymore.


secret agent woman said...

Ooh. not me. I am bored to tears by celebrity "news."

lagunatic said...

OMG - did you SEE what Vapid did???