How I Found Myself In A Courtroom with No Panties Part II

Okay......when we left off, I had finished explaining to Idiot from the County Attorneys Office that yes, I would be there, but not at 3:30 and not to just load my mentally and physically unstable grandfather in my car for a "danger ride". Now for, as they say, the rest of the story.....

I arrive at the courthouse and go directly to the county attorney's office. I had placed a couple of calls en route, one of which was to the office of a friend of mine who is the former county attorney here, only to find that he was in court in another county. Snag! But then was able to find that another "free legal counsel" type was at the courthouse. (it pays to have friends, for me, not them :-) )

When I went in I was told that they were already in the hearing but not to be upset because while I was on my way they had worked everything out with a gentleman from Adult Protection Services, he had spoken with someone from the VA Hospital and they would transport my grandfather by ambulance from the jail to the psychiatric unit there, all that needed to be done was for the judge to dismiss the charges in the courtroom.

I was dubious. There were other words exchanged that are unnecessary to this story. I was unkind. Damn me and my temper with the insipid people of this beautiful world of ours, but hey, you know what, my fucking head still hurts, my day to day life isn't always peachy and somebody needs to get bitched at every now and then or else, well, I'm going to stab an innocent.

After this *ahem* necessary exchange, I leave the office and slip into the courtroom. I start to look around. I notice that the only people I know are the attorneys, the police officers, the courtroom workers and the judge. Then, I take a closer look. I am surrounded by miscreants. Like, of the real kind. Not just like, our kind of miscreants, no, these are the people who we could only aspire to dream of understanding the sad depths of darkness inside the minds of, kind of miscreants, I mean, my grandfather shot at people, let's be clear, these are not speeding ticket people I am chilling next to today.

Suddenly, I almost laughed out loud! It occurred to me that I, the self-proclaimed Queen of let's not judge people, was sitting here judging people in this court of law, WEARING NO PANTIES!!!

Then I took another couple of glances around. I would almost swear that I was the only person in the whole room not wearing panties, which just made it that much better. Then, as all of this is going through my head, the county attorney turns and motions for me to walk up to the front of the room to the table in front of the divider. I am now walking up there trying not to shout to the room, "Yeah, I'm sans panties and my grandfathers nuts, fuck you, what about it!!!???" I did control the urge, but Oh. My. God. It would have felt so good! Plus, I know about 6 of the 8 attorneys and all 5 of the police who were on court duty and trust me, they would have LOVED it!!!

So, that is the story of how I found myself in a courtroom with no panties.

P.S. No, they didn't have a fucking thing lined out when my grandfather was transported to the VA hospital, in fact, he had to be transported out of the VA hospital because, hey, guess what?? They don't have proof he is a veteran. Sheesh!!

P.P.S. I wore panties today when I went back up there to tell them they fucked up

Wicked Girls Get Desperate, But Not Like THAT

I was talking with one of my not so wicked friends and she was telling me about some things going on in her life right now. As I was listening she actually used the word desperate. It stuck in my mind far after our conversation had ended. I thought about the last time I was truly desperate for something, or felt desperation in the way she was feeling it at this point in her life. She had used it in a way that made me feel sad and my heart reached out to her.(yes, I have one, it's just not touched by douchebags or "love when I can insert this non-word in a sentence" assclowns, random bitches and fuckups get no sympathy from me either)

My pondering made me realize that my feelings of desperation over the past several years were typically based on things such as desire to have some time alone, i.e., get the fuck away from me, I desperately want you out of my line of vision. Or a new pair of shoes,i.e., I would blow every man in that shoe department for those shoes I am so deperate to walk out of here wearing them. Sometimes I have a deep need to just have a night out with the girls, i.e., I give a fuck less how hard your day at work was I desperately need to get drunk, throw on some heels and makeup and lets go dance with men until they are so turned on they have to go circle jerk in the bathroom at the club, see you in 30 minutes. At other times it's a vacation with the love of my life, i.e., I desperately needed the trip we took a couple of years ago where we stayed in San Clemente and drove the PCH, went hot air ballooning and fucked like wild animals while watching the waves roll onto the beach.....mmmmmm, good times.

Point is, it hit me that none of the really wicked girls I know have ever shown signs of real desperation. Sure, we get worried or stressed. Fucking furious about things at times, no doubt, but desperate, not our scene. Why?

Simple, I realized, one of the key indicators of wicked girls is our absolute refusal to let anyone else control our destiny. It is by definition, OURS. Desperation stems from feeling a loss of control. I promise you, those who know me in real life could attest to this, there are lots of things going on in my life right now that I don't control the overall outcome of, but I am in total control of how I handle them, how I allow them to effect me and how I let them alter my life.

To all of you wicked girls in training, remember this; if you begin to feel a pang of desperation, in it's purest form, if you let it, it will control you. So, push it down, take control of it, conquer the situation, kick it's fucking ass and stomp it in the fucking head. If it lays in the floor crying and then tries to get back up, kick it again!!

In the end, you are your number one priority, I know this now, because as a mother, father, sister, brother, wife, husband, lover, friend you are no good to anyone if you aren't taking care of yourself.

Now you have a Wicked Assignment: Sometime between now and Monday, do one special thing for yourself then report back here in the comment section. Make it good and be true to yourself, don't cater to anyone but you.

Examples: yell at someone, get a massage, Skype cyber (LMAO see Wicked Confused post, Skype is officially only safe way to cyber), have too many drinks, skull fuck obnoxious guy at a party (just for you), have a slumber party with Neil Patrick Harris

Look forward to hearing what you did, I know exactly what I'm going to do, can't wait to share with ya'............